Mistakes were newbie mistakes, learning to navigate the change in the dynamic, jealousy issues, figuring out what everyone needed or wanted and trying to make the differing desires mesh.
He and I were not sexual together, unless we count when we were both with her at the same time. I guess compression is why it matters to me, I enjoyed the feeling I got from knowing they were enjoying each other. Plus I enjoy the three of us together.
I suppose the answer is I would have liked to develop into co primaries and I still would. I know he would be hurt and upset if or when we were to invite someone else in. I don't want to betray his friendship but wife and I don't want to end this poly adventure either. I guess that's why I'm stuck.
Background: wife and I are early 40s married 20 years. He is early 30s never been married best friend of mine / ours for 4 years.