Originally Posted by MeeraReed
That sounds like a perfectly normal poly date. I don't get why you think it's not realistic?
The only thing I would add is that in a real poly relationship, the two of them would probably ask about each others' other partners. At the very least in the sense of "What new with X? How's her job going?" Other partners are not usually an off-limits subject for discussion.
Having read this thread, I think you just need to get out there and go on some dates. I think you are really overthinking things.
After all, even if you were widowed and back in the dating game after a 30-year marriage, dating would still be different than it was for you 30 years ago. You would not be able to offer the same lifetime-partnership-and-kids even if you were single right now--just because of your age. I assume you are in your 50s or 60s?
So women in your age range, regardless of poly-ness, are not going to be looking for the same thing they were looking for 30 years ago. They will be at a different point in their lives, as are you.
I am not sure about some of the gift-giving limitations, women so love to show off baubles offered by admirers. But I know this, and wouldn't want to disappoint such a lovely partner.
As to your comment about respective partners, point well taken. But, should such a fantasy come even remotely true, I would long have introduced the woman to my wife, and there is a good chance they would have become good friends. Not in a bi way, that's not part of the package. As for me getting to know the lady's SOs, even I fail at being able to imagine how I would react to the hypothetical boyfriend/husband of a hypothetical girlfriend.
And I am getting out there in the real world, and even being on this Board I am getting out there. Anyone from the Lower Mainland reading this? Oh, I will consider the US Pacific NW, I have always wanted to visit Powell's.
Or Hungarians from anywhere. We can always have a rendez-vous in front of the old (now non-existent) National Theatre in Budapest (next time I go there), where the no.6 tram stops [a Hungarian in-joke].
Does it have to be my age-range though? I so had my heart set on a mature 30-year old!