Email sent, and received
I sent the posted email off to Chipmunk Wednesday evening. I told her I was sending it, and that it was important to me. That I would like her to read it and talk to Airyn about it so she and I could talk.
I got a PM from an observant reader of this blog of mine. Who's observations turned out to be very much correct. Airyn has been jumping to avoid excessive drama where Chipmunk is concerned. If saying something one way will avoid days of unpleasantness from Chipmunk towards Airyn then that is what he does. We talked about it, acknowledged it. I told Airyn that it helps me to understand, but it does not make this ok, or better. That once Chipmunk has taken the email into consideration she needs to realize what has been happening and make an effort to break the pattern with us.
Chipmunk is angry with me. Avoiding being around me right now. It's not a good day, and I'm not in a good place emotionally. I've been stressed over sending the email, but also resolved that this is the best way to get this out there. I know she does not handle confrontation well, and any conversation she needs time to process before she can deal with what ever was being talked about.
Airyn says this was inevitable. He told me last night that she was emotional, crying, upset, very negative. He does not see her as being able or willing to work on herself so that we can make this work. I told him today that I have found resources (thanks to this forum) that can help her when/if she is ever ready to talk with me, and do the reading.
More to come when I find out how things are. Airyn and Chipmunk are out talking, shopping, and walking around stores together right now.
In effect I have told Chipmunk that she has to grow up, and she has to start doing it now. That I can't wait for her to see this for herself any longer. She's not taking it well, and I'm not surprised. She always has a negative reaction no matter what the conversation is about, but this was big for her.
I really just want to have good days again.
Married to my high school sweat heart (20 year relationship). Talked about Poly, but put the idea off and had a kid instead. Stumbled into an FFM (Vee) that became an FMF (Vee).
No longer dateing my husbands Girlfriend.
Airyn: My husband (Straight)
Chipmunk: My x-GF, My husbands GF (Straight)
Wolf: my Daughter with Airyn
Boots: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married
History: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married