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Old 12-05-2012, 03:33 PM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,967

People will feel whatever it is they feel when they feel it. Then they will choose to behave however it is they behave. They have their preferences.

You may wish for certain outcomes or happenings in the quad -- but you cannot dictate it to be so. You can just hope, wait and see. You can only tend to your own behaviors. It doesn't much matter for polymath. Could call it family math, or work math -- basically it's just how communication happens in a group.

Serolynne explains polymath here.

I take it out a few steps further because I list the communication flow arrow in both directions and I list the breaking up "ghost layer" since the group in question is in a romance.

Not all people think it all the way out to "when this ends, how to we want to be to each other?" Because all relationships end. Even "til death to us part" is an ending. So you could consider keeping it real and planning for the ending with your poly people. So it can be a GOOD parting. Shoot, maybe even "til death do us part!" for this quad. Hope for the best outcomes, but plan ahead too for emergencies.

Each "mini relationship" inside the larger polyship needs TLC, time, privacy, respect, etc. Then the overall polyship is hopefully healthy. It's on the people in that tier to communicate their wants, needs, and limits.

I list how I would write the communication break out below in a quad polymath. Note that I remove the repeating things. Because whether it is written as 2+3 or 3+2 it is still the same equation.


(K+J) and (C+D)


K to K (how you related to yourself -- no longer a footloose single, no longer a partner in a duo. Now you are a quad person and take 3 other people's needs into account when you do things.)

J to J
C to C
D to D


K --> J (do you go to this person with your stuff well? Whether they are a lover, a meta, a friend, or combo of all the above)
K --> C
K --> D

J --> K
J--> C
J--> D




(K+J) ↔ D (communication flow arrow in both directions to save space.)
(K+J) ↔ C
(K+J) ↔ (C+D)

(K+D) ↔ J
(K+D) ↔ C
(K+D) ↔ (J+C)

(K+C) ↔ J
(K+C) ↔ D
(K+C) ↔ (J+D)

(J+C) ↔ K
(J+C) ↔ D

(J+D) ↔ K
(J+D) ↔ C

(C+D) ↔ K
(C + D) ↔J


(K+J + C) ↔ D
(K+J + D) ↔ C
(K+C + D) ↔ J
(J+C+D) <-->K


(K+J+C+D) working together as a team


How will we be when this ends? No longer


back to original couples of

(K+J) – (C+D)

or all singles

K – J – C – D

or some shape in between all together and all broken up?

Last edited by GalaGirl; 12-05-2012 at 03:59 PM.
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