Originally Posted by persephone
I am realizing that, while I have never had a partner who said an unkind word against my primary partner, my primary partner has been in several situations where partners or would-be partners of his were not nearly that respectful towards me, to put it mildly. I am also realizing that I have a huge problem with how he deals with those situations. Primary partner tends to be conciliatory and conflict-avoidant by nature, and tends to try to make peace between me and assorted volatile others. I told him today, I feel we need a zero-tolerance rule of trash-talking me, of any kind, by other partners or would-be partners.
I am wondering what people find acceptable and unacceptable in these situations.
What kinds of things have you said to partners or would-be partners who treated your partner with a lack of respect, insulted them, or engaged in trashtalk? Do you automatically break it off with such people, or do they get a warning?
Good question! I would think this happens to the best of us, sometimes I even find myself doing it. I think unless the trash talk is a legitimate concern, its coming from a place of jealousy or insecurity. We have to look within ourselves, or have a discussion with the disgruntled partner to see what is the root cause of the lashing out and work on it at the source.