Thank you Anne for your response. I like your idea/example that you provided. At times, I almost feel like it is "you had better be friends with her, or she will not allow this to continue". I tend to give in to whatever they want to do (nothig sexual, this is all public stuff- dinners, movies, going places) The pressure of it wears on me.
Because I am new, I was curious if anyone else had dealt with a controlling primary, as a secondary?
I have looked through many posts, and have not seen this situation much. In the beginning of our relationship, I would receive schedules for everything. When I would see him, when she would have him home, etc. I struggled with it- I tend to be a more spontaneous and easy going person. But went along, as it was easier to know what was happening. But I never was able to lose the feeling that she was bossing me around- that I needed her permission to do anything. Has anyone dealt with this before?