Originally Posted by notalways
Nothing really graphic but when it comes down to it this question is about sex. I have been seeing my primary boyfriend, who I live with, for about a year and I have been seeing my other partner for over a year now. In our relationship as a general rule I can do what I like but I need to use protection, which I would be doing that even if it wasn't a rule.
Recently things have gotten a lot more serious with my other partner. We have passed the casual relationship stage and gotten into the I love you and just want to spend time with you even if there is nothing sexual going on between us. We have taken this relationship very slow so it is kind of a big deal we are now admitting we love each other. After all this time we want to stop using protection together (I am on birth control, not looking for kids), but I don't know how to bring this up with my boyfriend. It sounds stupid typing it out but it is kind of a next big step in our relationship and I want to take it. Me and my other partner have talked about who everyone is sexually active with and the safety of things.
If it wasn't an awkward enough topic to bring up with my boyfriend, his girlfriend of several months just broke up with him and he is feeling very insecure right now. I am there for him as much as I can be, and all my partners know why I am less available right now. I don't want to push him over some emotional edge.
Who has had this conversation? How to do go about it? I don't want to hurt my boyfriend but I really want to do this.
Hi hun, I have had this conversation with my primary about my secondary partner, at the time we had just broken up with our gf so it wasn't a sit down talk well not at first but we did speak about it, we all agreed to be tested and does your secondary partner use condoms with other partner's he has? all you can do is ask and talk about it, are you using no protection with your primary? this MIGHT although I can't say for sure if it will affect how he feels about it.
agree to rules, testing every month and only do bareback with you but wait till he is hurting less, my oh was hurt and didn't want to discuss bareback or fluid bonding properly for a few weeks after the break up.