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Old 11-26-2012, 08:14 PM
Numina Numina is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 139

Originally Posted by Anneintherain View Post
How about you and he schedule whatever days a week for him to stay home with you during lunch, write it down on the calendar, and mention to Chipmunk that he has plans with you those days. Really if she will get upset about that - well, let her. That's ridiculous
This is actually what was supposed to happen last Friday, but then Chipmunk came home sick so the point was moot. I think in actuality it was stated that Fridays if she is working Airyn will not be meeting her for luch so he and I can spend that time together. I'll probably say the same about Saturdays, but first it has to actually start happening. It's the beginning of the week, so it'll b a few days yet. My work schedule is such that if I'm a sleep by 4pm then I get 8 hours before work. So weekdays Airyn meeting Chipmunk for lunch isn't an issue it's Friday and Saturday that are the issue. She has agreed, but I'm still waiting to see what happens.

Originally Posted by Anneintherain View Post
Well since I'm feeling chatty today -
Do you recognize that the reason you aren't getting some of your needs met is because you back down almost every chance you get? Seems you change what you are OK with based on how things are with you and Airyn at that moment. How can you get what you want if as soon as you state what it is, you follow it up with "But I don't have to have it". Well of course you aren't going to get it then. Bite your tongue! You are sending muddy messages, Airyn might be getting some blame for things when he feels he's just trying to follow whatever you said last.
You may be right here. Especially about the moving out/getting a bigger place thing. Not all issue are wishy washy though. Hmm something to ask Airyn about. See if I'm being clear or confusing.

Originally Posted by Anneintherain View Post
You know, if she moves out and lives separately, its not as if down the road when everybody thinks living together would be a healthy and fun thing for all involved that you cant all move in together then. That could be a very sensible plan.
Airyns NRE tells him that her moving out will alienate her, and that she will have no interest in continuing a relationship with him or in moving back in at some point. My position is that this reasoning isn't healthy, and I would like for Airyn to see that too.

Thank you two for the insight. I really appreciate it.
Bi-sexual female

Married to my high school sweat heart (20 year relationship). Talked about Poly, but put the idea off and had a kid instead. Stumbled into an FFM (Vee) that became an FMF (Vee).

No longer dateing my husbands Girlfriend.

Airyn: My husband (Straight)
Chipmunk: My x-GF, My husbands GF (Straight)
Wolf: my Daughter with Airyn
Boots: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married
History: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married

Last edited by Numina; 11-26-2012 at 08:19 PM.
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