I'm going to wait for some counseling before making any hard choices, trying to keep to the idea of a holding pattern for this month...but it's growing harder.
Virtually every interaction with my husband seems to add to that feeling that, while I do care about him, there is no attraction, no passion there at all. I've told myself I could try to push myself, to "fake it till you make it", but that thought isn't terribly appealing, either.
My boyfriend and I are stable only when I don't bring up any questions or concerns about his new potential GF. I tried to talk to him today about it, based on some new info from a mutual friend- about how it seemed to have already moved into the infatuation stage, much to my surprise, and trying to deal with some concerns I had about that. He got upset, frustrated with me, feeling guilty and I am now fearing that he associates me with those negative feelings, while he's bathing in the NRE for this other girl. Not a very stable basis for a poly setting (not that it ever has been, but I was really hoping that he and I might get through it) and it doesn't bode well to me about the prospect of us weathering his new relationship.
I'm feeling pretty sad right now, as it seems my gut keeps telling me that both relationships are beyond salvaging.