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Old 11-25-2012, 03:03 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Originally Posted by ThatGirlInGray View Post
Yeah, she gets way overly worked up over it, but how is, "It's nothing, don't worry about it" better than just telling her what's on his mind? It may not be hugely important, but obviously it's a big enough deal to keep his mind on it and she's noticed and asked, so why not just answer??
Exactly.

After enough situations similar to this, my husband's worked out that it's much simpler to say "My boat won't start, can't figure out why" the first time I ask "What's wrong?" Then I stop wondering, which means I stop pestering him to "open up and talk about his feelings" when his feeling is just frustration about a trivial matter.

When his rumination is about something more serious, he's also learned to tell me he's not ready to talk about it. Then he either figures it out on his own, in which case his mood improves, or else he talks to me about it. So I've learned to give him space in between.
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