Hmmm, do you think you could go further into the "relationship angst" that you speak of? I think I know what you're saying, but just curious if there are specific details to that.
I also agree with SchrodingersCat (love the username, btw) that it's probably a bad idea to hold on to the idea that something will happen if there's a possibility that it won't happen. I mean, I want to say it's good to be hopeful, but it's not all the time. Sometimes it's best to just let things happen naturally. To not expect anything to happen, but if they do, great! And if she does give you a second chance, then awesome! But it's also not fair for her to keep you waiting on the hook, not knowing if she is going to take you back or not.
I do know the healing process after a break up takes time, so I understand your concern about not knowing if you guys can really be friends or not. I don't think there is any shame in saying that you might need some time to recover and heal. But it sounds like you and Rose could have a healthy friendship down the line, it just might take some time to get to that comfortable friendship place.
Just know your comfort zone, know how to go outside it, but don't strain yourself. Take it one day at a time. Good luck!
"When we are first born, all we know is how to want, we want food, we want attention. Natural instinct, I guess. But kindness is something that we all have to learn as we go. It's something that grows and develops slowly over time. True kindness isn't something we are born with, it's something we have to work at, we have to mold it and shape it within ourselves. Not everyone has it, but I think everyone has the potential." - Honda Tohru