It's been two years since I've been on here.
I've been doing a lot of soul searching since then. I've realized that nearly every relationship I've ever had has been non-monogamous, some under what I would call successful and consensual conditions, and others not so much, yet it always feels new each time. I've realized so much about my gender and what needed to come forward within myself -- I realized how much of me was growing tired of pretending. I took a long break from polyamory to decide what I wanted and needed for my life, and now I find myself embarking once again into what feels like uncharted territory.
But I know I've been here before. I can share experiences I've had with others. The stories sound familiar; the feelings, the complications, the struggle, the closeness... All of it.
I know so much more about myself and humanity than I have in the past. I can better articulate who I am and what I need. I have learned what absolutely does not work and does not fit, and I have a clearer idea of what I want to strive for.
I still find myself having questions. In a society that is still largely ignorant to non-monogamy, there is a missing lexicon, a missing cache of imagery and standards to inform my decisions. "How do I work this?" times a million. There's something nice about making it up as I go along, but guidance would be nice, too.
Which is why I'm here again. I got so much from bouncing ideas off others before, and I hope to have a similar experience again. Having had time to marinate in my own juices (ew, I know) I'm eager to begin this conversation chain yet again.
I'm Jules, by the by. Perhaps I was known by a different assemblage of syllables before, but "Jules" is what works best now.