I understand why a person says one thing and does another, but I think it is wrong to blame another for your actions, and I am unhappy your husband has done so - you seem to be a good and patient partner, and I am sorry more progress hasn't been made since you were last posting, one way or the other, and I do wonder if you can come to a content equilibrium or if things will have to go somewhere more drastic eventually here so everybody can find their happiness.
Don't have a lot to say, just wanted to say there is another person rooting for you, and that to not let yourself take the blame for things you did not do, you can't make somebody feel or do anything, except yourself. Keeping my fingers crossed for you. I know this road is hard and C's acceptance of the situation must be even more heartwrenching considering what is going on.
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.