Originally Posted by AnotherConfused
I sometimes wish that we could live together as friends and partners in raising our children, and just let go of that part that is causing us so much difficulty, having a romantic partnership. But he desperately wants a conventional life. So I will give another try at becoming a conventional wife.
I still haven't heard a peep about what your husband has done to change a single thing. Once again, it's you making all the sacrifices for what your husband wants. What about what you want?
In other words, before you try to become the conventional wife, I think you should let it be enough effort on your part that you've made those changes to the relationship with your boyfriend. It's your husband's turn to show his commitment to you and the marriage by changing his behaviour.
Like GG said, give him a specific time frame to show he's making changes. Tell him that at the end of that time frame, if he has shown progress, you will continue having the less-than-you-want relationship with your boyfriend; but that if he does not meet you half way, then you have no obligation to make up the difference..