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Old 11-17-2012, 04:57 PM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is online now
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,815

Jones -- thanks for chiming in! That's always a good thing.

Basically I am hearing your willingness is somewhere around here:
WANT: I would like you to know my willingness to fluid bond with A is at this point at this time.

NEED: I do not NEED to be fluid bonded to A. I am willing to be, and would like to be, and just want you to know where you come down on things so I can have your information. My need is FEEDBACK.

LIMIT: I acknowledge previous trust problem. On my end I feel healed from it.

LIMIT: I am on BCP, so I feel that addresses the pregnancy potential. If that should fail for some reason and I end up pregnant we all agree it would be handled by __________. (You don't have to share the trio decision. Just make sure the trio does talk about it!)

REQUEST: I need information. Where are you at with it? Where is your willingness? Are you willing to entertain the possibility or too early for you to entertain comfortably yet? I am willing to respect your wants, needs, limits but I want to know where you willingness is at -- at THIS point in time. I need feedback. Thank you.
Something like that? Or am I missing the ball park?

If that IS the correct ball park?

Well... where DOES G's willingness lie at this point in time? Only he can answer that. He could say "I am willing to ____. I am NOT willing to _____. " And whatever the blanks get filled in with is cool. But speak up. Fill them in so other people can know where you are at. They cannot mind reader. G-- someone in your polyship is asking you for feedback. And your readiness/willingness is only something you can discern.

If you (G) are struggling... How can others help you to discern it? What feedback do YOU need to help you sort? Before feedback can be given, what ARE the reservations you feel? It sounds like you could be at the "identify and articulate" part of the "sorting stuff" out process.

I salute you BOTH for trying to approach this calmly and reasonably. That's always a good thing. Way to go!


Last edited by GalaGirl; 11-17-2012 at 05:05 PM.
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