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Old 11-15-2012, 07:42 PM
ThatGirlInGray ThatGirlInGray is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Northern Cali
Posts: 552

Originally Posted by TheBalance View Post
I am not seeing other people. I have considered it, but have concluded that it just isn't for me. I have no desire to be with other people. She has asked me to see other people because she feels guilty about being the only one. I really wish that I could give her what she needs, that's why I have been trying to hang in there.
Her guilt is not something you can do anything about. That is something for HER to work on HERSELF, much like you have to work on your issues with jealousy.

I've been in her shoes. I understand the guilt. But it isn't for you to fix. Nor, really, would you seeing other people help, because THEN she'd likely feel guilty for pushing something on you that you didn't want to do AND you'd probably be resentful as well as unhappy. The question you need to answer for yourself is: Can I be happy in a relationship with her while she is in a relationship with others? The question she needs to answer for herself is: Can I be happy in a relationship with someone who is only in a relationship with me? If the answers are both yes, then you can move forward and work on figuring out how said relationship will work. But if either answer is no, then trying to force a match in either direction will just result in everyone being miserable.
Pan Female, Hinge in a V between my mono (straight) husband, Monochrome and my poly (pan) partner, ThatGuyInBlack
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