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Old 12-24-2009, 04:20 AM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: In Redpepper's heart
Posts: 4,742

There are a lot of examples of the type of unhealthiness I think you are referring to. Physically abusive relationships, co-dependant relationships where one person manipulates the other through their weaknesses such as addiction. I think we have all seen people go down a path of destruction in trying to fill a need desperately. Usually this is because they are not connected to themselves I think.

After splitting up with my ex wife I went down a path where I thought all I needed was sex. I almost slept with some one who was completely unhealthy out of sheer belief that this was a need and what I was supposed to do. Luckily my body said no and my mind regained control. That was a very low point for me but out of it I grew immensely. I also explored casual sex and found that I didn't "need" sex just for the sake of it. All of this lead to me being prepared to love and "need" Redpepper in a healthy way.

I have found something very specific in Redpepper; complete trust and the ability to share my darkest thoughts and history. I do feel this would be extremely hard to find with any one else. While I don't consider being this open a "need" with every one, I do consider it a need to reach the level of depth I have with her.

So I guess my "needs" are very individual based.

Hmmm..great topic Lilo!!

Thanks for pushing my thoughts on this Seventh Crow

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Monogamy might just be in my genes

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