It seems "lonely and sad to me" because it is "lonely and sad TO ME" I am not judging in that statement and would suggest that if it is seen as so then that is a judgement.
What I wanted to say about my last post was that having talked to Mono over the last days it occurs to me that I have been not speaking to our relationship in such a way that would promote people around us thinking that I am okay in it. I have been saying "I'm not allowed to have other men in my life sexually." I should of been saying, "I'm not interested in having othe men in my life sexually as I want to experience what I have and that is more important to me." while this is longer to say,
it reflects more how I feel.
Good point Mono. Thanks.