I actually asked him not to tell her we were shopping for rings
Is this the right thing though?
Would you have felt better and have been better served if you had stated your need as "Please be PRESENT with me when we are doing marriage related tasks on our date here." That seems to be a possible unarticulated need to me. She could know you are ring shopping or car washing or whatever... but if he is PRESENT with you doing it instead of phone distracted -- Would you feel better?
Could maybe seeing her get all crushy at the restaurant have triggered that same emotional response? Like... "There she goes again leaking over. When is my air time alone
with him with him present with me?" even though its a different scenario?