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Old 12-19-2009, 03:48 AM
Quath Quath is offline
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There was a follow up to this article at Daylight Atheism. This one is pretty interesting because it addresses some misconceptions on polyamory. The 3 misconceptions are "Polyamory? That's okay, as long as <insert horrible things here> isn't going on.", "Those relationships are always about drama/don't last/are dysfunctional.", and "Telling people that you're polyamorous is over-sharing it's like telling them about your sex life."

The article is pretty good. The comments are very interesting. Here is a sampling:

Penn: I don't have any problem with polyamorous relationships. I certainly do not think they are inherently immoral. But, I would be against giving legal marriage status to multiple partners. Just one example of problems arising is employer benefits. Should employers have to provide benefits for an indefinite

Sharmin: This is a great post, JulietEcho. I think I read something similar you wrote for Friendly Atheist. The way that you describe polyamorous people being treated reminds me of the attituide towards LGBT people, with people who are prejudiced using every bad example to make judgements on the whole group. I hope that the future will be better.

Cello: I personally don't care for polyamorous relationships because there is a selfish component in it IMO. An unwillingness to sacrifice a personal desire.

Yahzi: There are two traditional reasons for enforcing monogamy. 1) Protecting men. In societies without monogamy, rich old men have multiple wives, and young poor men remain single. Not only is this bad for the men, but it's bad for society. Bored young men make a lot of mischief - like wars (to gain wives) or crime. 2) Protecting women. Men traditionally have most of the power in relationships. Allowing them to have multiple wives decreases the power of each individual wife. It is assumed men need sex; by removing the monopoly the wife has on providing sex you reduce her bargaining position. Since she is often economically dependent on the man (or at least her children are), this creates an even worse power imbalance.

JulietEcho: People find different things that make them happy. I don't think this is selfish - I think it's a natural part of everything that comes with love and sexual relationships. People who think the benefits of monogamy outweigh the desire they may or may not have for more partners will choose monogamy, and more power to them. Those who choose to be poly aren't more selfish though - they just want different things.

There are many others. I thought overall that it was a very good discussion.
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