Originally Posted by Hades36
3. There is a lot of racism in the poly community! PLove and I have met a number of White people who made it clear by their actions and conversation that, while they were poly, dating outside of their race was still something that was taboo. We've run into the same shit with swingers; usually its a White couple that makes it very clear that they are absolutely not open to any other race but White. Hey, everyone has their preferences, so I can dig it. But if you're White and poly, I would ask how many times you've put yourself into spaces in such a way that you could actually make a real connection with Black people beyond the superficial one that most of us experience? In my experience, poly is extremely segregated. I know a number of Black couples/singles who are poly (or at least non-monogamous) but who only connect with other Black people; when PLove and I attended our local Poly Meet-up, I was the only Black person there.
I would disagree with the bolded.
Having a preference for a certain aspect of people I dont think implies that you somehow are against or dislike the other possibilities, and that goes for racial characteristics as well as things like hair color, height, weight, etc. I have a serious thing for red-heads but I wont turn down someone who is blonde specifically because they're blonde.
From what I've seen, non-whites are a very small part of the poly community but when they are part they tend to be accepted wholesale. In the local group I've been to, there are maybe ten (out of ~50-60) people who are non-white and of those five or so are black. I've never seen anyone treat them with anything less than respect, I've seen them get physically involved with other people (and couples) with no discomfort on either part.
Maybe its because I'm in LA, but I've never seen non-white ethnic people be treated with anything less than full respect. If anything, they tend to be a bit of a special interest and a novelty because they're so uncommon in the poly community.