Questions, questions, and more questions
Sunday Mom has to leave to get home, and Chipmunk has plans with her family. Pre-Birthday get together, her Birthday is Monday. Having gone to bed between 2:30, and 3:30 am the past two morning we all sleep till about 10am then help get Mom's car packed. Airyn, Wolf and I follow her to Whole Foods for some last minute grocery shopping for items she can't get close to her home. Mom ends up leaving around noon. Chipmunk stayed home to get dress up for her family get together. We pick up Chipmunk and drop her off at her mom's place.
When we get home Airyn goes back to his photo's from the night before uploading some to facebook so Mom will have something to see when she gets home. I start cleaning. The kitchen is piled high with dishes, and the bedroom has clothes, and makeup scattered all over the place. So I start in the kitchen. I clear off the coffee counter, and am washing dishes (by hand) Airyn notices what I'm doing and comments on it. He says that it's really rare for me to do dishes, and hugs me from behind. I tell him that I know it makes him happy when he doesn't have to do them. To which he replies that I'm not supposed to be doing dishes, I just shrug. It is our way for me to work outside the home, and for Airyn to keep the house; cooking, cleaning, watch Wolf, ect.
Then I move towards the bedroom. I tell Airyn that I'd like to relax and have time to play our computer game some, but that the bedroom has to get cleaned up for us to be able to relax. We get everything cleaned up, and spend the next couple hours just reconnecting, and relaxing together. With me having to work then next morning I'm in bed earlish. With so little sleep over the weekend it's not to difficult to fall asleep. Even better Airyn's sleepy to so we snuggle and such till I'm a sleep. He gets up at some point, gives me kisses, and heads to the other room to keep an eye on Wolf, make food, and pack me a lunch for work. I wake up a few hours later hungry, and join him in the kitchen for a snack. I hang out with him for about an hour then tell him I'm going to try to go back to sleep. He follows me, and says he could use a nap, sets up a timer/alarm, and joins me in bed. We have a great time, and before long are both a sleep. I'm still fast a sleep when he gets back up. Chipmunk gets home late, and they come let me know she's home. It's all very sweet.
So now it's Monday, I'm up getting ready for work. I tell Airyn that if they plan to go to school I may want to stay home and sleep. That I'll see how I feel when I get off work. He's ok with it, but says he'd like me to go with them, he likes having me close by. By the time I get home, and take Wolf to school it's 8:30am before I can get a nap. I'm really sleepy. Airyn asks me to set an alarm for 9am. I do, then snuggle up against his back and drift off. They get up with the alarm, but I'm so sleepy I barely wake up. Around 10 Airyn checks on me asking if I'm staying in bed. Which of course I am. Then he says that they are stopping at a taco place Chipmunk wants to try when they get done with class, and tells me to message him when I wake up. I say ok, have fun. Chipmunk comes and kisses me bye then say, Love ya. on her way out.
I am floored, she hasn't said anything like that to me since before she moved in. It makes me sad, as I wish the love she was offering were more then that. Then it hits me. I still want her. I struggle with this new sadness, as they are headed for school, but eventually fall back to sleep. Their class gets out just before 1pm, and I wake up at 2:30. See that they are out still and send a message to Airyn saying I'm up and asking how things are going. Today is Chipmunk's Birthday. I check my messages and email, and start responding to everyone. I'm just getting dressed to go for a walk and pick up Wolf when they get home.
I tell them that I've only been awake about 30 mins, and was about to get ready to walk to pick Wolf up as I didn't know when they'd get home. Airyn says I should know that he would leave me to walk to Wolf's school. I told him I figured I'd see them there that they might just go straight there while they were out, but that since he didn't get/respond to my message I wasn't sure. No anger or animosity. Airyn's glad that I look so rested, and Chipmunk is looking happy and relaxed. She has looked that stress free for a while now. So I tell Airyn that I'm glad I stayed home, that even if I hadn't slept it would have been the right thing to do. That I can tell Chipmunk had a good day out with him. They take me back to the Taco place as it was really yummy, and I haven't eaten since work. Airyn suggests the 1$ donation to breast cancer Margarita to go with my taco. Having not eaten that one drink was enough for me to not be up for driving. So Airyn takes over.
I'm laughing by the time we get home telling them that they are a bad influence. That they got my drunk in the middle of the day. Then Chipmunk lays down to get a nap before her parents pick her up for her Birthday dinner with them. I'm messing around on the computer, and finishing answering my messages for the day while Chipmunk is getting up and dressed to meet her parents. This time she doesn't say by she just leaves. I comment about it when Airyn tells me she gone. But he says she was hurrying as her parent had been waiting for a little while. I'm a little down cast, and I tell him how surprised I was when she said "love ya" on their way to school that she hadn't said that since before she moved in, and my disappointment that it was all she could offer. That I realized as they were leaving that I still want her. Want more from her then she can offer. He just hugs me and say not to be sad.
So we start talking about Chipmunk and her family while taking a shower. He's talking about Chipmunks sometime aversion to public displays of affection. They been talking about it. He's been hurt that she sometimes avoids his kisses when we are out. Thinking that she's ashamed of him or something. I tell him that it's worse for me and point out that even though Chipmunk worked for a very gay friendly environment (her previous job had 50% gay/lesbian employees), she never once referred to me as her girlfriend. It was always about him. But when we are getting out of the shower I give Airyn some very suggestive kisses and tell him no more depressing talk. Lets just say that we didn't actually get dressed after that. Then he's telling me how late it is and suggesting that I try to sleep. He tells me he'll check on me later, but needs to make dinner for Wolf.
Airyn didn't really respond to my statement that Chipmunk never referred to dating me, or that I was her girlfriend. That she always chose to tell co-workers that she was dating Airyn. He had a somewhat surprised look on his face. I could tell he had not thought of it. But having openly spoke it I realized that Chipmunk never saw me as a viable relationship for her. It just makes me sad, and confused. If I wasn't a viable relationship then why was she all over me at the restaurant that first night? Why was she so quick to continue flirting with me after that night? I don't have any answers only more questions.
Married to my high school sweat heart (20 year relationship). Talked about Poly, but put the idea off and had a kid instead. Stumbled into an FFM (Vee) that became an FMF (Vee).
No longer dateing my husbands Girlfriend.
Airyn: My husband (Straight)
Chipmunk: My x-GF, My husbands GF (Straight)
Wolf: my Daughter with Airyn
Boots: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married
History: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married