Originally Posted by Cleo
She's asked me not to tell my husband (husband and I know her boyfriend well). I hate that there's something I can't tell my husband. I'm not going to because I want to respect this wish of hers.. but I think I do want to tell her that I don't want to socialize with them as a couple while this is going on.. ugh.
Ugh indeed! I am sorry your friend has put you in this position.
I have made it known to my friends that I will never
allow myself to be put in this position - and if they are truly my friend then they will never ask me to.
It's not that I turn around and report to MrS everything that is told to me (quite honestly, he is just usually not that interested), but if something came up in conversation on a given topic I don't want to have to filter out "secrets" - so don't tell me if it's a "secret".
Interestingly, MrS came to the same conclusion on his own behalf (it's not as though we have a "rule" about it or anything). I tell a story in my blog here about where he was on a trip with a friend who wanted to go to a strip club but didn't want his wife to know. MrS refused to go if it was supposed to be a "secret" - he wouldn't remember to not mention it to me if it came up, he knew that I wouldn't remember to not mention it to her if it came up - better not to even bother.