Originally Posted by Airto33
Neither. I was using the analogy to describe the strength I feel I need to have in order to be ok with her seeing other men.
How long have you been at this? Have you ever been in a situation where your wife wanted to be with someone that you knew first, or that you felt some sort of competition with?
We have been poly for almost 10 years. The first relationship that last over 2 years, we did not realize that we were poly until it ended.
I would have to say she has never been in a relationship with someone I knew first or someone that I would feel competitive with. That does sound like an interesting and unique situation to be in. I feel your girlfriend should take you feelings into consideration when getting involved with someone else. If I was not comfortable with a guy my wife was seeing I truly believe she would not continue or pursue it. We are very open and communicate a lot, especially when a potential partner comes along.
Hope it all works out for you.
Typically if there is someone she is interested in, we meet them for the first time together. In actuality, she has only had 2 boyfriends so far, one relationship lasting 2 years and the other lasting almost 3 years. There have been a couple of potential guys, but never worked out.