for example, they have spent this morning following our night together texting each other and I am screaming inside to be included and know whats being said even though I know it is probably all just irrelevant girl gossip etc.
If you want to be included in some kooshy post sex texting -- text each one a lovey yourself. There.
You don't have to have actual peekies at their girl gossip to be included. You could even ask if they could reassure you it's just girl gossip.
But every tier inside a polyship wants to have it's privacy. Not that YOU are being left out of anything great but seriously -- maybe you want to tell Angel cow jokes and save the horse ones for the other. Nothing betraying or horrible or really anything that is major. It's just nice to share something on that tier sometimes alone.
So the main difference between envy and jealousy is that envy is an emotion related to coveting what someone else has, (got this starting now as I am beginning to fall for Angel and am becoming envious of Rose and Angels already close bond together) while jealousy is the emotion related to fear that something you have will be taken away by someone else (obviously got this going on as discussed earlier but I know its unfounded).
WTG -- you are starting to NAME the demons plaguing you!
Keep shining a light in dark corners -- once you have looked at all there is to see within you can breathe a sigh of relief hopefully. If not all the way better, certainly better than to start.