i am a bit bewildered by this post, i use the word slut as a positive thing so can't really connect with the fear of being one. i am one and am proud to be (because i am proud of who i am as a whole, of which that is part).
have you heard of the book "the ethical slut"? i have identified as a slut since i was fifteen but finding that book when i was 30 felt like coming home. one can certainly be a poly slut, i suppose one can also be poly without being a slut if you want.
seems like the problem is that you define casual sex/one night stands as markedly different to other contexts in which you do or might have sex/connect intimately with someone - and your partner doesn't.
maybe you need to explain and clarify to P that this was just casual sex and what that means for you so that he stops saying the things/making the assumptions you describe in your post?
Last edited by dakid; 03-15-2010 at 09:56 PM.