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Old 10-24-2012, 05:27 PM
Stevenjaguar Stevenjaguar is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In a flat place in the middle of the US.
Posts: 91
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Mm Hmm. I know that feeling. I went through it at the beginning of my relationship and a helpful person led me to understand C a little better. Some bi people aren't a mixture of hetero- and same sex attraction all the time. They go back and forth. With my fiancee it's like throwing a switch and I can tell right away which way the switch is flipped. When she goes to see her gf she says she loves me, I'm the man in her life, etc. etc. but I can tell that for that time she's really not turned on by me. She's into J and even though I'm welcome to come along (we're all friends), it's J who gets her attention. Fortunately there's enough of C to go around and I don't get left out.

Yes, I knew C had a gf when we started dating and it was ok with me, but yes, there's that little jealously thing in there somewhere generating poisonous thoughts. Mine is fear and insecurity that somehow I'll lose her love. Yes, that's always a possibility but that little voice says J will be a part of it. Believe me, it's taken a lot of work. It helps that J is a good friend of mine, too, and we've known each other a long time. We do a lot of things together like concerts, movies, dinner, a canoe trip and stuff like that and I have cachet to talk about my fears.

It'll probably take a lot of work for you, too. That little gremlin will always be there, it's just a matter of choice of whether or not to listen to it.

Last edited by Stevenjaguar; 10-24-2012 at 05:29 PM.
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