The begining: Part 3
Prior to Chipmunk asking me out on a date, I had asked her if she would be ok with me taking Airyn out for a date night. Told her what i would like to be able to do, and that She should feel free to go out that night as well, that Wolf is old enough, and quite capable of taking care of herself. She says that it is ok with her that I want to take Airyn out, but that she doesn't like the idea of leaving Wolf alone for hours.
Eventually I find what I am looking for and start planning a date night to take Airyn out to a drive-in movie double feature. I keep Chipmunk in the loop about the length of time Airyn and I will be gone, and again suggest that she go out for a time. She says she will think about it. This date was planned to be around an anniversary of Airyn's and mine, and gets canceled due to some unexpected medical expenses causing a lack of funds. We reschedule for the next weekend, and I offer to buy dinner from burger house, (a fast food place that Chipmunk has not been to and expressed an interest in). So this time everything is a go, but does not go as planned. Chipmunks work schedule interferes with the timing, as well as the stops made to pick up last minute food, and shampoo, ect. Chipmunk is going out to an arts event with a few friends. She intends to see J, but has decided that she is no longer interested in pursuing that relationship.
Airyn and I leave, Chipmunk is getting ready for her evening out, and Wolf is set up with a couple movies to watch while everyone is out. Airyn and I realize that we have left so late we won't make it to the drive-in on time, so last minute change of plans. We end up at a nice theater watching a 3 hour long movie. We have asked Chipmunk to let us know when our friend arrives so we know when she's headed out for the night. So we get a text about an hour after we expected saying just that the friend is MIA. Airyn has the phone, and has been keeping an eye on it. So now we are sitting in a dark theater, unable to respond due to lack of lighting, and have no idea if she is at the event or at home. This causes some worry and tension for myself and Airyn. We are both distracted with worry.
Chipmunk has a very flirty nature and can get very physically friendly when she has been drinking. Because of this and because the friend she will be hanging out with has been dealing with a crappy end to a long-time relationship, we have asked her to watch how much she drinks. We are asking that she be care not to make our friend uncomfortable, and not put herself in a position with J that will leave her feeling upset later.
The movie is over and as we are making our way to our car Airyn is texting Chipmuck trying to find out what is up. She sends a text saying that our friend is getting her drunk. This worries him so he calls we find out where they are eating and ask about meeting them there. So here I am on a date with my guy going to met up with our girlfriend. Feeling pretty low that my plans went array, and trying to decide how I feel about spending the rest of the evening with our girlfriend instead of just as a couple. I talk to Airyn about this and we decide that we do want to go hang out instead of heading home. We end up having a good time, Chipmuck continues drinking till she is at the point of excessive flirtatiousness with our friend. This causes Airyn to try taking control and getting her flirting focused on the two of us. It almost works, we leave with my date escorting Chipmunk to the car and me walking with our friend.
The results of this being that she is done bothering with hooking up with J at these types of events, but she is still interested in being friends so they send text messages back and forth. Till one night she gets a text from J asking, Don't you love me any more" which weirds her out as they weren't actually dating since he was brushing her off most of the time.
About a week later, Airyn and I are not in a good place together. He has been very distracted over a period of days. This has lead to him not paying much attention to me, but me watching him paying attention to Chipmunk. It has also lead to him being verbal frustrated and taking some of that out on me. Eventually I get tired of these interaction and call him out for it. This causes a huge (heavy) discussion, where he initially shows a lack of understanding, and compassion. Causing me to become more upset and walking out to sit on the swings next door. Airyn follows me and apologizes for being so frustrated and distracted. We talk about how these are things that had always been part of our relationship, that he has always been able to rely on me to be understanding when he's in a foul moody place. In turn I'm explaining that if he were distracted then he should be just as distracted with both of us. I told him that I have not been feeling as though Chipmunk wants to be with me. That her lack of interest, his lack of attention, and him being frustrated with me every time we talk is too much for me to handle all at once. That all this is coming on the heals of having been a bystander in our group interactions too much, and while I'm trying to move past that it's still an unhappy place. So I'm telling him that he can only have one or the other moody tendencies. If he is distracted then he has to talk to me calmly, and kindly. or if he is being frustrated then he needs to pay attention to the small details, like kissing me good morning. In essence I'm asking him to either be nice, or be nice. This results in him feeling that I don't feel secure in our relationship, and has kinda floored him. I tell him that I'm not saying anything new, I'm just getting better at talking about it.
I talk to him about watching him and Chipmunk fall in love, and how Chipmunk and I are still very distant with each other. That we are trying to go out and have a good time, and I'm trying to take each moment and make the most of it. But that having so much negative, and uncomfortable around me, and in front of me is hard. That I need him, I need more time to be with just him, but that I also want more time to be with just Chipmunk. That I want to repair the rift she and I created by trying for too much to soon. He tells me that we should go out and have a good time, and that we should be sure to plan more outings just the two of us.
For Chipmunk and my date we go out and have Airyn drop us off so we can drink, and not worry about getting home safe as he will be picking us up. She is disappointed that the location she pick out is dead, as in we are the only customers, but we try making the most of it. We have a good time, and some good conversation, but have not gotten enough for the amount of alcohol we drank, and call Airyn up to come get us earlier then we had intended. All in all it was a good night, with a few road bumps that we worked around.
Married to my high school sweat heart (20 year relationship). Talked about Poly, but put the idea off and had a kid instead. Stumbled into an FFM (Vee) that became an FMF (Vee).
No longer dateing my husbands Girlfriend.
Airyn: My husband (Straight)
Chipmunk: My x-GF, My husbands GF (Straight)
Wolf: my Daughter with Airyn
Boots: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married
History: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married