Originally Posted by redpepper
very true, thank you alphafour. It really doesn't matter what others are doing, just what I am and how I feel. It seems where we are there are a lot of poly people that are in a party, have fun with it, free love kind of mode.... not necessarily loving in the romantic, soulful, "this spans all time" kind of way that I am with my men. I think this is what is making me feel different.
It's like a lot of other things, if a lot of people get involved, if becomes a fad, and loses the original intent because of the beliefs of certain "leaders" of the movement. If the leader in your area is just a "swinger" then you local group becomes a "swinging group." I believe poly is much more than this, where a group becomes a community, and forms a sort of "tribal relationship" and they "love" each other, more like a commune where everybody works for the common good of the tribe.
In the late sixties, there were "free love" communes, and there was lots of sexual freedom and sharing of common goals within the communes. There are still some old hippies continuing to live in such communes. The fad isn't as popular, but there are those who stuck to their values and continued. I believe those are the correct models to follow.