Originally Posted by Anek
I get the point that if you never try anything new, you will never know if you might be maybe happier by doing something different, and that's why I like to experiment with new things. But if I find I don't like something, it could be the best growth tool ever but I won't do it again.
I particularly take issue over trying new things to please a partner or retain a partner's interest.
There was a time when I felt pressured my partner(s) (not one of the current partners I have) to do anal sex. One individual would try to sell it to me as "needing to let go of [my] hangups" (they were operating with the assumption that the reason I didn't want to do anal sex was because I'd been culturally conditioned to see that part of the body as "dirty" or "shameful", which was SO NOT THE CASE). At some point, I decided that I was DONE with proving to the world how "not-uptight" I am, and I would tell new sex partners right away, "My ass is exit-only. If you want me to do you, we can talk about it first." Recently, I have been moved to re-consider this boundary/preference; but it is ENTIRELY on my own terms and not out of being pressured by someone else (although my change of attitude WAS "inspired" by a partner's interest, it was not because I felt pressured to please that person or prove to them that I'm "open-minded").