Originally Posted by SummerRain
Sally is a straight guy who has adopted a female persona and though I would almost say is a crossdresser, she has informed me that she dresses in girls clothing all the time. She identifies herself as a lesbian. The lables mean nothing to me. I met Sally as Matt, but Matt has all but disappeared and Matt is now Sally 24/7. Are you with me so far?
Here is a man, who dresses like a girl, identifies as a girl, is into BDSM, switches from a top to a bottom, is into pony play and all sorts of other things and doesn't condone polyamory?
I cannot tell you how many conversations I have had with Sally about acceptance and having people accept him/her for her kink and her lifestyle choices
If Sally is now living as a woman, the correct pronoun is just "her," not "him/her." Sally is not a straight guy, she is a lesbian. Sally is not a "man who dresses like a girl," she is a woman, or a transgendered woman if you feel the dire need to make it clear that she has a penis.
The labels may mean nothing to you; they mean nothing to me either. But they mean a lot to the people who go to the trouble of sticking them on themselves. The fact that you want to have a relationship with this person, but you have not taken the trouble to educate yourself on the transgendered lifestyle and transgendered issues, could be one of the reasons she doesn't condone your own lifestyle.