"This is exactly the issue in my opinion. People trying to police their fellows instead of living their own lives is the root of a lot of relationship drama. "
Well, setting limits to what is acceptable to you isn't policing someone else, just giving them the choice of respecting your limits or experiencing the consequences of not doing it.
To me there are limits to what I'll accept in my partner's behavior. I think it's true with everybody. If my partner picked up guys at bars and had unprotected sex it wouldn't be acceptable to me because of the riskiness of it, and I would have a problem with sex parties, too. I think it would take a lot of reassurance for me to be okay with it.
Some people are in to BDSM, too and to me that's a turn off, but under some circumstances I would accept that's who the person I love is and choose to live with it. Under other circumstances, not. Sex parties are about exhibitionism and voyeurism I think, and if I had a partner who was into that I might be okay with it if, say, it were with a stable group of people I was comfortable with. If it were at a club or some other public place, to me that's risky and I wouldn't be okay with that and would be faced with a choice of how to change the relationship. No, not an easy set of decisions by any means, but as long as it's not done with the attitude of, "I'm controlling you or else," I think you're on good ground.
Last edited by Stevenjaguar; 10-21-2012 at 06:38 PM.