Originally Posted by SummerRain
I cannot tell you how many conversations I have had with Sally about acceptance and having people accept him/her for her kink and her lifestyle choices ... and she doesn't CONDONE polyamory?
Yes, this is definitely a situation where Sally is allowed to be "different", but you have to fit into what she considers "normal". So what do you do with something like this?
First, understand that she said no to you, but the reason she said no is not about you. Don't take it personally. Move on and live your life.
I would bet Sally's attitude of "I can be different, but no one else can" extends far beyond polyamory. If you did start a relationship with her, you would get a lot closer to her various attitudes about different things. If you think it's unpleasant before you even start a romance with her, just think how it would feel to you if you were deep in a romance with her. I would consider this "rejection" a gift, and move on.