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Old 10-19-2012, 06:00 PM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
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Originally Posted by playswellwithothers View Post
I think I can be happy with myself and also wish for more companionship. One of the things I am working on in therapy is the novel concept of "I get to want what I want!" with no guilt and shame for the wanting. Doesn't mean I'm going to get what I want, or that it will look exactly the way I think it's going to.

I know your comment is well-intentioned, but it comes across a bit as trying to shame me for having wants, needs, and feelings. I've done enough of that to myself for years. Kinda not going to accept it from someone else at this point.
I apologize for coming across that way, it was not my intention. I certainly was not trying to shame you, because I don't think you've done anything wrong to merit shaming. Indeed; wants, needs, and feelings are what make us human and you're right to honour them.

You're absolutely correct, there's nothing wrong with seeking companionship. I prefer that way of presenting it. I had gotten the impression from your first post that you expected a new person to make everything all better. A lot of people think that way. Having previously been the person who was supposed to make it all better, I react poorly to that. I'm relieved to hear that you're taking responsibility for your own needs. I hope you find what you want!
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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