Hmmm...a good portion of the poly folk I know locally are genderqueer in some fashion, so I suspect the poly community as a whole is likely to be more accepting and welcoming than the general populace.
As for me, I identify folks by the gender they present, so anybody identifying as female is female, as far as I'm concerned. I've flirted with a couple of trans females, though haven't gotten involved with any as yet, and I'm straight (and I do wonder how sex would work for me were I to get involved with a woman with man bits).
And, oh, you can't qualify as a unicorn because you're not single.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.