It helps to have someone close to, like a friend, whom you can talk openly with.
I'm somewhat used to the sort of "half in, half out" because the people that really matter to me know and are alright with it. Most of my coworkers and friends know but very few of my family knows.
For me, the worst is having to bite my tongue when people talk about relationships. Today at work (I work with adults with special needs) we had someone getting lectured by one of our other counselors regarding relationships and she said "If he's not willing to date you and only you, he doesn't care about you as much as he should." Which, in the instance of who she was talking about, was actually true but in hearing things like I want so badly to contest it but I cant.
I'm also ready to punch the next person in the throat who says "Oh I couldn't do that, I'm too jealous!" I'm so profoundly tired of that response and EVERYBODY says it. I realize its not particularly vapid or insulting, its just that its invariably the first thing out of someone's mouth when they find out.