Originally Posted by fuchka
It's inevitable we can't write out our whole stories, esp when things are moving quickly
I was just curious because I had a chain of events somewhat similar to yours. My partner & I were open to having other relationships, but hadn't met anyone else we wanted to be with. Eventually we realised we wanted to live together, and decided to get married (well, civil union-ed). We were neutral on the official marriage part, but knew both our families would prefer it.
After we'd decided this, is when I met someone else, and it quickly got serious... this was our first proper poly experience. It was interesting dealing with the newness around that, and everything it stirred up, in combination with wedding planning. I'm pleased to hear you two made it through as well! Many happy returns
We did make it through. It took a lot of hard work on both of our parts. I have been seeing a therapist that is alternative lifestyle positive and happens to be an experienced polyamorous person herself. That has been hugely beneficial. She's been impressed with how hard the two of us have worked and didn't shy away from the hard subjects. I've been incredibly grateful for her guidance that has lead us to those hard discussions. I feel so much better now, and the whole thing, as painful as it's been, has brought us even closer together. My husband tells me all the time how grateful he is that I led us down this path, because it's caused our relationship to become so much more than it was before. We're very close and can confide anything in the other which to us means the journey was worth it.