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Old 10-10-2012, 08:19 PM
SkylerSquirrel SkylerSquirrel is offline
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 76

This didn't bother you before you had a kid?
Before I had a kid I was very poor at recognizing what was abuse and what was not. His family acted like it was normal. While I was pregnant I started doing a lot of research on how to be a good parent, and I learned a lot more about what abusive behavior looks like.

Also, having a kid multiplied my self-confidence by like a million. I was full of self-doubt before. I still struggle with self-doubt sometimes, as you can probably tell, but at least I know it's an issue.

Instead ask for mandated counceling and parenting classes for both of you
I was actually thinking about this last night. Asking for counseling seems like a good way to reconcile the two contradictory statements you and GG noticed.

You obviously see some good qualities in you kids father or you wouldn't have stated that you still love him.
Yes. There are good qualities in everyone. Even people who are physically abusive can have good qualities. But they still hurt people.

I guess to be more clear - I would like BabySquirrel to be influenced by Five's good qualities, but I'm worried about him being psychologically harmed by his not-so-good qualities.

It is also keeping you in a state of fear, which is unhealthy for you and will not be in the best interest of your child.
This I am well aware of. I just have a hard time figuring out what to do other than a) being under the influence of fear or b) just trusting that everything will work out on its own without me doing ANYTHING at all.

That's why I asked for advice ... I need people to look at this objectively, because I have a hard time doing so.
Independent polyperson seeking friendships, in which physical intimacy may or may not develop.

I do not wish to attach to any particular person. My love knows no limits.
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