SC,
This is a very well-written post. I think that you convey your thoughts clearly. Poly does not mean "free-for-all, anything goes" - people are still people, bad ideas are still bad ideas, unhealthy relationships are still unhealthy relationships and what is good for the goose is NOT ALWAYS good for the gander (for a given goose and gander

). Every situation is unique and should be analyzed on its own merits. Thank you for taking the time to express your views.
JaneQ