Originally Posted by nycindie
Anyway, what I find interesting in this thread is your question about feeling jealousy if a primary is doing stuff with someone else but not you, if it's something that you want to do with them. I just don't see myself sharing at that level. It's enough for me to know my lovers are having sex with other people; I don't need the specifics, and wouldn't imagine asking unless there was a definite reason to know. I don't feel weird asking things like if a lover wants me to use a certain technique to do something, and I wouldn't mind talking about what they are up to with others, per se, but I certainly wouldn't seek out the info, or feel like I had to be informed at all times. Maybe this is more of a thing for hierarchical relationships?
I'm not sure it's about the hierarchy. I was thinking maybe it was more about a couple-centered approach to poly: the primary couple shares detailed information & specifics with each other about their other lovers.
(Or maybe that's what you mean by hierarchical, that there's a primary couple and clear non-primaries.)
Single, straight, female, solo, non-monogamous.