I'm glad you guys are healing. But I don't blame you for feeling wiggy a bit. State your wants, needs, limits. Straight up.
You sound like you are doing that.
Is there a limit on drinks? Drugs? Kink? -- Things that could impair her judgement?
How about focussing on what you DO want rather than what you do not want?
I want you to
- behave like a woman in a closed triad.
- say no to making out /sex with people other than me or K. If hit on you say "Thanks, but no thanks. I'm in a closed triad."
- To drink nonalcholic beverages
- to guarantee K's first party is fun and emotionally/mentally/physically safe for her
- to guarantee that my first party since crazy time is emotionally/mentally/physically safe for me. I do not want to experience seeing you with your hands down people's pants.
There will be other annual parties. But there will be no other first annual party since the crazy time. Your behavior at this one will affect your trustability growing back or not more than any other party ever will. Choose your behavior well.
I cannot control you. I cannot control how you behave. I want to be able to trust you. Thank you for taking my considerations on board by asking me about my feelings. I like that.
Then see how she behaves and how she holds her own leash.
When you guys leave and who stays where -- seems easier over all to have the trio talk NOW. Come to agreement on that before going in how the party ending happens. That can help reduce the stress for you and G doesn't have too remember to many directions in the moment. The more relaxed you can all be there the better for all!