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Old 10-02-2012, 04:28 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,707
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Just tell him how you feel.

You don't have to be afraid of feelings you know. We just feel what we feel. Rain is rain. Sun if sun. Emotion is emotion. We don't choose when or how to feel the things we feel.

We just choose how to behave in response to those feelings. React or act with intention.

You can choose:
  • Tell him. And then he can choose how he behaves in response to the news based on how he feels.
    a) he feels same and you both make a space to grow those feelings by spending more time together. You win relief, knowledge, and a new challenge.

    b) he does not feel the same and you can feel what you may feel next and make your next choice based on full information of what IS (which is way better than what iffing yourself to death! You win relief and knowledge! You stay friends, nothing changes. You drift apart? So what? We all choose who we want to stay in relationship with or not. You still win relief and knowledge.
  • Do not tell him. (And you choose to deal with how THAT makes you feel by how you behave next.)

    a) Usually it feels annoying so that you want to pop with the news! And just tell! You win relief and knowledge! Move back up to a) and b) above because now you have told.

    b) Or it was a passing fancy and the initial NRE brain chemistry that was a fun crush but not a flier. You win the fun of a flight of fancy for a bit and the happy hormones that comes with it when you crush from afar and eventual relief then the brain stuff chills.

    Really, you win all 4 ways. Just pick your win.

GG

Last edited by GalaGirl; 10-02-2012 at 04:33 AM.
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