A lot of tiny seemingly insignificant experiences, thoughts, and conversations, have transpired and I haven't had a chance to write, and right now I'm heading off to the beach with some girls, but I at least wanted to notate that this morning I was taking a shower with my SO and I said:
"come on in now, the water is not too hot, it's how you prefer it."
She said "But it's not hot enough for you?"
I said, "It's hot enough for me, but I like it more when it's even hotter. Just like you are enough for me, but I like more partners even better."
We've transitioned into allowing me some freedom to be open in the relationship, coupled with the openness to play and spend time together with others.
I realized this morning, that I am not monogamous, and that she is. And with that realization a lot is to follow. For one, my vision in life, is not monogamy, and hers is. This is a real point of clarity for me on the differences we have. There is a reason for my realization this morning, and it has to do with seeing other girls, and one experience in particular. I will have to save that for when I have a further moment to write however. But I learned that:
we are oriented towards what we believe we want to become.