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Old 09-28-2012, 03:06 AM
Arinbjorn Arinbjorn is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Northern Illinois, USA
Posts: 32
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Originally Posted by MusicalRose View Post
Hello! My father grew up in Illinois (Arlington Heights), so I'm somewhat familiar with the area. I is unusual to see other poly folk so close to my and my partners' ages around here. Nice to see you!
Thanks for the welcome. Glad to meet y'all.

MR - I've been through Arlington Heights plenty of times. I grew up in Rockford, and I live just a few minutes north of Rockford currently.

As far as polyamory goes - it's a pretty drastic change for me. My wife is the one who really suggested that we give this a legitimate try. I think I'm growing into it fine, but it seems like a lot is happening very suddenly. She's incredibly happy though - which makes me very happy. I am also pretty happy myself. I guess in the back of my mind, I'm just being cautious still.

Things pretty much revolve around her - we are the spokes on her extroverted hub, though we are all good long time friends, and have been getting involved with each other as well in this new way. It honestly helps that at least locally, I'm the only male involved. Maybe that's a double standard of some sort, but I guess that's just how I feel.

She does have one person where the relationship is just her and solely this other person. Makes me contemplate about searching out something akin to that for myself, there is a sense that this could be more balanced. Yet, I am wary of thinking too overconfidently in myself that I could handle even more - or wary of channeling a subconscious jealously into a new want for myself.

I see it as her + me in the middle. She has someone that only she has that sort of relationship with on her end. Then there is a person we share. Then there is a person that we share who is just testing the waters, but I'm fairly certain will end up going back to monogomy. Then, there is a blank spot on my end that mirrors her open spot. I don't know if that makes sense or not?

My wife and I have both been honest about our emotions and are communicating way more than before about our emotions, which is genuinely awesome. I think we've both grown a lot as human beings as a result. Polyamorous relationships have definetly been positive thus far.

Last edited by Arinbjorn; 09-28-2012 at 03:16 AM.
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