When you've never tried something before, usually the first step is trying it out. My partner and I went on a date with our new girl this Saturday and it went swimmingly, we're all very excited. Following suggestions from people who have replied to my post I researched triads. It seems like the common pitfalls are going in looking for someone to fill a notch, usually having expectations of what your perfect partner needs to be to fit into your relationship. Nobody is perfect, and from our previous experience you can't hope to change people, you have to see a person for who they are. Bisexual members of a triad are apparently somewhat rare, but without that I don't see a true triad existing, only a hinge. Fortunately this girl wasn't found on a basis of relationship, or filling a gap for us, it was just common interests, and the more we all talked the more we all shared so much in common, but still with our occasional personal independent pleasures.
Reading several articles and personal stories that seems to be the way that successful triads form, they can't be forced, you just have to let it happen, friends first then partners whenever, maybe. She lives about an hour from us and I'm wondering if the distance would be beneficial, metering out our contact to more meaningful interactions and preventing burnout, or will being apart just let the heart(s) grow fonder and let things be glanced over? None see any issues with another yet, and we're all aware that we are just hanging out and having fun together, which we all freely admit we did. Also read up on raising children and it seems if the relationship exists before the children and the children are told it's ok just different, they grow up fine, which is very encouraging. I look forward to reading more about people's experiences and advice, trying to see the potholes before they tear off the undercarriage.