Thank you for your cautionary words, D. I only just discovered this forum yesterday and there's a lot here to absorb.
So far I have only managed to get through Hyperskeptic's tale. And frankly, I appreciate his journey and conclusions. Ethical monogamy, as he's left with, may be my course as well, but from the start.
I know my wife and I are renegotiating things I probably could have foreseen would need to be renegotiated from her side. But frankly, that's more than enough to deal with now. Yes, we've kicked a door in, but I'm not at all inclined to rush out there in search of another partner for myself. She's "not going anywhere," she says, and didn't go looking for her new love. She chalks it up to serendipity.
I trust her. I do. I think if anyone can manage love for and from two people honestly and fairly, she can. If she can't, she'll likely withdraw from this other relationship and side with keeping her family intact. It would not come without considerable pain, but I suspect that would be the likelier outcome given the circumstances.
Is this belief terribly naive of me? I have no wish to be a doormat. I've been open and honest with her and she has responded in kind.
I will keep reading this forum with an eye for healthy and unhealthy outcomes of poly relationships. Thank you, D, for urging me to proceed with eyes wide open.
BS (Just realized that's the acronym for "BraverySeeker." Unintentional but kinda funny.)
Last edited by BraverySeeker; 09-22-2012 at 02:32 PM.