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Old 09-19-2012, 06:42 PM
persephone persephone is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 68
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LovingRadiance, very impressive list! I LOVE rule number 7. So simple, and I don't know why I never thought of it. I am certain that D doesn't always present us to partners and potential partners as a united front, which may be at the root of our problems.

Anneintherain, thanks so much for your post. I plan to show it to D and think it will give him some food for thought. I don't believe that D ever said anything bad about me to R. Whether he gave me "good press" is unclear. I know he spoke about the past difficulties we had surrounding the incident with the psychotic woman who threatened my life. R took this information and used it to suggest to him that I had capitalized on these difficulties and used them as a means to limit and control D in his poly practice. I was utterly outraged when I found that out. That one thing, on its own, made me realize that even if she hadn't been vetoed for sexual safety reasons, she and I never could have coexisted happily as metamours anyway.

D really does believe in primary and secondary. We have been married for almost 25 years and he does not want that to change.

I wonder how to plan for another episode like the one we had.
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