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Old 09-18-2012, 11:20 AM
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rory rory is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Europe
Posts: 497

More poly-related post!

Me and Alec have now moved to our permanent apartment! We'll be here at least half a year but maybe more. It's much smaller than where we were living previously (no way we could afford that size in Dream City because it's more expensive here), but I like it a lot. It's technically a studio, but there's a door between the bedroom and the kitchen, and the rooms are actually the same size, so it feels more like a (very small) one bedroom apartment. Which is totally great! The location is also awesome, even though that wasn't really even the priority when looking.

I'm going to a women's poly meet-up with Mya soon. I've never been to a poly meet before, but it's cool that Dream City offers this kind of thing. I don't really have much expectations, and don't know if I'll want to go again, but might meet some cool people so why not go and see.

I totally love having two short-distance relationships, btw. There are two aspects to it: I like to be able to spend a lot of time with specifically these two people, but also I like the fact that I now have two of my closest people near me. I don't have that many close friends, and with all the moving it's been a luxury when there are even two people I am close to and see regularly in the same place. Additionally, there are of course other things. Like closeness, company, and let me tell you that currently I am extremely satisfied with my sex life.

With Mya it has felt really natural and comfortable to move out of ldr, and even though I never considered not being in a relationship because of the distance and would do it again if needed, I really hope we'll get to stay close to each other for a good long time.

Alec has so far been really great and sweet about the whole change. This is unexpected but nice, because for so long he's been more ambivalent and reacted mostly neutrally towards anything poly-related. In the beginning of the poly thing he experienced more intense compersion but also more of the insecurity, and it has all leveled out a lot. It is totally fine by me if he is ambivalent about my other relationship, and I'm happy with that. However, obviously I enjoy seeing him happy and enjoy the reassurance I get when he is so clearly supportive (reassurance I can live without, because my culturally-induced guilt about non-monogamy is mine to manage, but reassurance which is nice to have and lessens the managing I have to do myself). Examples. The messages (not too many) he's sent me for goodnight have been very sweet. Another thing is that when I've said something like "I think I'll be home around x time" he responds something like "yeah, be as long as you want ". Just small stuff but makes me feel happy, one of the best ways to show me love and appreciation.
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