Given all the to-and-fro that happened here, I would really like to hear an update on what has gone on recently in your world. We identified some things as potentially problematic for you - it would be good to get a little "calibration" on what has and hasn't worked out for you so far.
Please check out The Birdcage - an open, friendly Polyamory forum for all parts of New York State
"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb