Originally Posted by thirtysilver
Suffice to say that I do have mood and anxiety problems on top of having zero self-esteem. If my amorous feelings are really phantoms created by my psychological issues, then it is those issues I need to deal with first and foremost. But if I truly am feeling love - or something like it - for R, than I need to address it as such.
Does that make sense? I'm not sure if anything I say makes sense anymore :/ I feel like a crazy person.
If, at this point, you are unable to tell the difference then it's pretty clear that you have to address the underlying psychological issues before moving forward, even if what you are experiencing is genuine love. Either way, it seems the issues of anxiety and self esteem should be addressed for the benefit of any relationship you have, whether your current marriage remains monogamous or not.